My new best friend

So you might remember my reference in my last blog post to having no company while my mama's are out playing...or whatever it is they do in the place they call the 'big smoke' (their words not mine!). Well this week I made a new friend. My mama's seem to get a little scared when I go out and explore at night time, they want me to go out during the day, when all the other cats are about?! Forget about it! I much prefer the night, when its an adventure. At night I rule the town. Other mama's don't let their cats out at night because they're scared of the foxes, but the foxes are my minions. I rule the foxes and my mama's don't know about it. Although I did almost get caught plotting with one fox the other night when one of my mama's came home.

And today, my foxy friend was sunbathing in the roof of a shed at 11am in the morning, I asked him to keep a watch on the house two doors down, but please be a little discreet about it. There is nothing more confusing then seeing a fox in broad daylight sitting on a shed roof for all eyes to see!

Tonight when we meet by the crooked tree I shall be having words!

When the cat is away...

Hang on a minute! No that's not right. It should be 'When the mamas' are away'...

The three girls I live with - the mamas - have been rather absent lately. Monday to Friday it is always the same. In the morning they rush around before they disappear, one at a time, through the big moving wall. I believe this is what you humans call the front door. The hours pass, with me left alone to my own devices. They don't even have the decency to leave the TV on for company. Selfish! Mmm fish... Excuse me, I do digress. Now where was I..? Ah yes.

So they leave me home alone. Then they have the audacity to come home past the hour when the outside lights are switched off. Don't they know that 6pm is my dinner time! Now that is just taking liberties.

I might just leave a hairball present in each of their beds. After all they must learn some way.

Me phone, My phone, I phone?

So all three of my mama's have this thing that they are always on, they call it their 'I Phone' and spell it 'iPhone' but surely they mean 'My Phone'?! Considering they work in media and marketing you would expect them to have better grammar wouldn't you?! I mean, I'm a cat and here I am typing on their computer, while they are too busy to notice as they are playing on their silly My-phones.

Sometimes I think they love those things more than me. Take, for example when I try to wake up mama Sam for my breakfast at 5.30am. I try curling up next to her and purring, poking her and scratching her, but nothing will make her get up. Then when her alarm goes off she will grab her phone from the dock thingy and then put it next to her on the bed. I try and sit on it and push it off the bed, then she gets mad and finally gives me my food.

Can you believe it? If I had thumbs I'd pick that thing up and throw it on the floor if it would make her get up when I want my food. I shouldn't have to wait, I rule this house. They're always saying I'm the house cat. And when a moggy rules, his minions do as he says, right? Well someone needs to tell that to my mamas, in particular the one with the giant mane (it's like a lion's hair but I'm the only cat around this place!).

Hello. Yes you. I'm talking to you.

Have I got your attention? Bene. Welcome.

Let me tell you a bit about myself. I spent my early years roaming the streets of North London, fighting for survival. Every day was a struggle. I never knew where my next meal would come from. It was not an easy life I tell you.

Then one day I met these three lovely ladies. They invited me to come live in their villa in NW London. How could I say no? I have lived with my Mamas for one year now. And as long as they treat me well and feed me, they won't feel the sharp end of my claw. However, as they have forgotten some times there has been a couple of 'incidents'.

Now add this blog to your reader and follow me on Twitter, and there will be no need to sleep with the fishes.